It has been so long! But I have much to say...

Oh how I have missed blogging. But between being a wife and  Tegan's mama, work, and school (Yes, for some strange reason I am still attempting to complete my program, don't ask me why)... well, it just got away from me.

There is much to say that cannot be said on outlets such as facebook. So, we begin again. In case anyone happens to be reading.... Beware :)

I found This Article very interesting.
It discusses the "evangelical" agenda in the United States as it relates to politics, something that I think about alot, especially during this last election.

This really struck me, because I have thought this EXACT thing  while hearing friends and family spew their political/ religious views during the election season (assuming that I agree with them) :

While most evangelicals are still “pro-life,” abortion is not their only concern. Not all are convinced that Republicans have the best answers to all the life issues.
While most evangelicals are strongly committed to strengthening family life, not all think equal rights for gay and lesbian people are a threat to the family. Poverty reduction, immigration reform, a consistent life ethic, the creation care of environmental protection, a less militaristic foreign policy, and a deep commitment to racial and economic justice are all issues of concern.

The ironic and tragic thing about the religious right is how little of their own agenda they have achieved. And by voting for a conservative ideological agenda, they have actually hurt the poor, resisted immigration reform, promoted endless wars, and neglected the environment.

 

So, why do so many of my "evangelical" friends and family members vote Republican, no matter WHAT? Why can't they educate themselves? Why are they so fixated on abortion and gay marriage? Why don't they want to talk about the REAL issues we face, like the extreme income gap between the wealthy and the poor....

Why do so many of them blame our budgetary problems on the welfare system, when they themselves have made use of these welfare programs? "Well, we just needed a little help at the time." Or, "Why not take advantage of the system, everyone else is?" .... That is great and all, but don't agree with me that these programs are necesarry, make use of them, and then act like the world is going to end when a Democrat gets elected. I find it hilarious that many of the 47% Romney referred to who use government assistance or are in the military voted for HIM, and many of the rest of us who have never used government asistance voted the other way. Why is this?

Do we just believe what we're told? Vote, act, live, and believe the way the people around us do? Is that how Tegan will think?
Why...don't people read anymore? Why don't they think critically? Are we lazy? Are we just that self-righteous? And why are the people who act so concerned about MY religious beliefs (or lack of) these same people who don't seem to think about the world at all beyond their own "personal relationshop with Christ" yadda yadda.... (Ah, but that is another matter entirely)

These are the things I think about. Oh, to be inside my head. It's.... interesting in there to say the least. :)
 

Food for Thought...

"Imagine if the Tea Party was Black" - by Tim Wise

Let’s play a game, shall we? The name of the game is called “Imagine.” The way it’s played is simple: we’ll envision recent happenings in the news, but then change them up a bit. Instead of envisioning white people as the main actors in the scenes we’ll conjure - the ones who are driving the action - we’ll envision black folks or other people of color instead. The object of the game is to imagine the public reaction to the events or incidents, if the main actors were of color, rather than white. Whoever gains the most insight into the workings of race in America, at the end of the game, wins.

So let’s begin.

Imagine that hundreds of black protesters were to descend upon Washington DC and Northern Virginia, just a few miles from the Capitol and White House, armed with AK-47s, assorted handguns, and ammunition. And imagine that some of these protesters —the black protesters — spoke of the need for political revolution, and possibly even armed conflict in the event that laws they didn’t like were enforced by the government? Would these protester — these black protesters with guns — be seen as brave defenders of the Second Amendment, or would they be viewed by most whites as a danger to the republic? What if they were Arab-Americans? Because, after all, that’s what happened recently when white gun enthusiasts descended upon the nation’s capital, arms in hand, and verbally announced their readiness to make war on the country’s political leaders if the need arose.

Imagine that white members of Congress, while walking to work, were surrounded by thousands of angry black people, one of whom proceeded to spit on one of those congressmen for not voting the way the black demonstrators desired. Would the protesters be seen as merely patriotic Americans voicing their opinions, or as an angry, potentially violent, and even insurrectionary mob? After all, this is what white Tea Party protesters did recently in Washington.

Imagine that a rap artist were to say, in reference to a white president: “He’s a piece of shit and I told him to suck on my machine gun.” Because that’s what rocker Ted Nugent said recently about President Obama.

Imagine that a prominent mainstream black political commentator had long employed an overt bigot as Executive Director of his organization, and that this bigot regularly participated in black separatist conferences, and once assaulted a white person while calling them by a racial slur. When that prominent black commentator and his sister — who also works for the organization — defended the bigot as a good guy who was misunderstood and “going through a tough time in his life” would anyone accept their excuse-making? Would that commentator still have a place on a mainstream network? Because that’s what happened in the real world, when Pat Buchanan employed as Executive Director of his group, America’s Cause, a blatant racist who did all these things, or at least their white equivalents: attending white separatist conferences and attacking a black woman while calling her the n-word.

Imagine that a black radio host were to suggest that the only way to get promoted in the administration of a white president is by “hating black people,” or that a prominent white person had only endorsed a white presidential candidate as an act of racial bonding, or blamed a white president for a fight on a school bus in which a black kid was jumped by two white kids, or said that he wouldn’t want to kill all conservatives, but rather, would like to leave just enough—“living fossils” as he called them—“so we will never forget what these people stood for.” After all, these are things that Rush Limbaugh has said, about Barack Obama’s administration, Colin Powell’s endorsement of Barack Obama, a fight on a school bus in Belleville, Illinois in which two black kids beat up a white kid, and about liberals, generally.

Imagine that a black pastor, formerly a member of the U.S. military, were to declare, as part of his opposition to a white president’s policies, that he was ready to “suit up, get my gun, go to Washington, and do what they trained me to do.” This is, after all, what Pastor Stan Craig said recently at a Tea Party rally in Greenville, South Carolina.

Imagine a black radio talk show host gleefully predicting a revolution by people of color if the government continues to be dominated by the rich white men who have been “destroying” the country, or if said radio personality were to call Christians or Jews non-humans, or say that when it came to conservatives, the best solution would be to “hang ‘em high.” And what would happen to any congressional representative who praised that commentator for “speaking common sense” and likened his hate talk to “American values?” After all, those are among the things said by radio host and best-selling author Michael Savage, predicting white revolution in the face of multiculturalism, or said by Savage about Muslims and liberals, respectively. And it was Congressman Culbertson, from Texas, who praised Savage in that way, despite his hateful rhetoric.

Imagine a black political commentator suggesting that the only thing the guy who flew his plane into the Austin, Texas IRS building did wrong was not blowing up Fox News instead. This is, after all, what Anne Coulter said about Tim McVeigh, when she noted that his only mistake was not blowing up the New York Times.

Imagine that a popular black liberal website posted comments about the daughter of a white president, calling her “typical redneck trash,” or a “whore” whose mother entertains her by “making monkey sounds.” After all that’s comparable to what conservatives posted about Malia Obama on freerepublic.com last year, when they referred to her as “ghetto trash.”

Imagine that black protesters at a large political rally were walking around with signs calling for the lynching of their congressional enemies. Because that’s what white conservatives did last year, in reference to Democratic party leaders in Congress.

In other words, imagine that even one-third of the anger and vitriol currently being hurled at President Obama, by folks who are almost exclusively white, were being aimed, instead, at a white president, by people of color. How many whites viewing the anger, the hatred, the contempt for that white president would then wax eloquent about free speech, and the glories of democracy? And how many would be calling for further crackdowns on thuggish behavior, and investigations into the radical agendas of those same people of color?

To ask any of these questions is to answer them. Protest is only seen as fundamentally American when those who have long had the luxury of seeing themselves as prototypically American engage in it. When the dangerous and dark “other” does so, however, it isn’t viewed as normal or natural, let alone patriotic. Which is why Rush Limbaugh could say, this past week, that the Tea Parties are the first time since the Civil War that ordinary, common Americans stood up for their rights: a statement that erases the normalcy and “American-ness” of blacks in the civil rights struggle, not to mention women in the fight for suffrage and equality, working people in the fight for better working conditions, and LGBT folks as they struggle to be treated as full and equal human beings.

And this, my friends, is what white privilege is all about. The ability to threaten others, to engage in violent and incendiary rhetoric without consequence, to be viewed as patriotic and normal no matter what you do, and never to be feared and despised as people of color would be, if they tried to get away with half the shit we do, on a daily basis.

Game Over.

- Tim Wise s among the most prominent anti-racist writers and activists in the U.S. Wise has spoken in 48 states, on over 400 college campuses, and to community groups around the nation. Wise has provided anti-racism training to teachers nationwide, and has trained physicians and medical industry professionals on how to combat racial inequities in health care. His latest book is called Between Barack and a Hard Place.
AND, he is white. GASP.

GRE Update

I did not do very well.

Blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I did ok on the verbal section, but missed the score I need on the math by like 30 points (3 questions). Did very well on essays. If the whole freaking thing was essays I would be good as gold. but NO. I have to pass a math exam that is hard as hell to get into a graduate program in which I will not have to take a SINGLE math class. what kinda sense does that make?

Anyway, I have been told I might be able to get in on probation, where I have to keep a certain GPA for my first semester. I think I am going to meet with an advisor about it. I dont know yet. Truth be told, I'm avoiding thinking about it. Because that's just what I do. ;)

GRE, Working on the house, and so on...

I take the GRE in 10 days. Wait just a moment while I get over this brief wave of nausea.

Ok, better. I am SO nervous. Already. I am afraid I will bomb it. And then have to try to study AGAIN and take it AGAIN. It will take about 4 hours to take. There are two verbal sections, two math sections, and two essays. It is all broken up and timed. I hate standardized tests. HATE them. I have been trying to study for about an hour each day and I am taking a full length practice test online saturday morning.

In other news, Tony's little sister Sherri is pregnant. I'm excited for her... also a little worried because it wasn't planned and they have only been married 6 months... and she is in the middle of nursing school, and they have no health insurance, etc etc etc. I could go on an on about why I am worried... but I know they will be ok no matter what they have to face. They're pretty self-sufficient/ responsible. I am just a planner and can't imagine not being ready for something like that. But that is why I am me and she is she right? (that didn't sound right.. should it be "she is her"? nope, still sounds wacky. oh well)

Hmmm what else... we are planning on re-rocking our driveway this weekend and lining it so the grass doesnt grow in. After that we have the following things planned over the next several months:

-sprinkler system in the front yard

-expand flower beds in the front yard

-plant a live oak

-cover the deck in the backyard

...and that is just the outside. There is a whole separate list for the inside! It never ends when you own a home... but I wouldn't change it ;)

Ok that's all!

Anniversary

Today is our five year anniversary.

I love the fact that I can say I have no regrets. That I am happy. That after five years, I still love this man more than anyone on the planet. I would say "oh, it doesnt seem like we have been together that long" but truthfully I feel like I have known Tony all my life. He knows everything about me, and I him. Maybe that has something to do with the fact that we have already been through a lot together. Anyway, I love him!

Thinking...

I'm thinking about my grandmother today. She fell this morning and was rushed to the hospital at about 6:00. My mom will not call me back... I wonder if anyone is with her or if everyone was too busy... I wonder if this will make my mom and dad take her seriously when she says she is weak and frail... I wish I could snap my fingers and be there... I hope she is ok. My brother and I are her only grandchildren. She is like my second mom. I love her.

New Year, New Post, New Things

I have decided that I am applying and will (hopefully) begin grad school in the fall 2010 at Ut Arlington. I will be getting a Masters in Public Administration, and I am freaking excited.

Posting it here makes it feel real... like maybe I won't back out this time. I bought a GRE prep books this weekend and the math is killer, but I am pretty sure I can study up and do it. I think I can I think I can...

Hopefully this will give me options. Options to work in a position/ area that I am taken seriously, given responsibility. Maybe make more than measly pay( although that isn't the first priority) AND, I am super excited to take polysci and urban planning classes because I am a DORK.

I am planning on meeting with an advisor within the next couple of weeks, we will see!!

Friends coming in

Our friends Katy, Chance, and their little boy Dash will be coming to see us next weekend (Labor Day weekend) And, I am off Monday and Tony is off all weekend! woo hooooo I can't wait!

Now if I can just find some things to do this weekend to keep myself from pure BOREDOM, we will be ok! (Tony works all weekend)

Is this for real?

Frustration of the day ( I know this is becoming a recurring theme of my blog, but good lord I just get frustrated with some things)

http://www.kltv.com/global/story.asp?s=10933571

This is a story about how all Texas public schools will now be required to teach the Bible. I haven't done enough thorough research to see if this is truly accurate but I will take this story at face value.

My reaction : Are you freaking kidding me? Will they be teaching Judaism? Buddhism? Islam? Hinduism? Or any of the other major religions practiced in the U.S., and in Texas for that matter?

No, just Christianity. I do not see this as something that should be tought in PUBLIC schools. Ugh

Article...

If you are at all interested in the healthcare debate, read this:

http://www.slate.com/id/2224938/pagenum/all/#p2

It is my opinion, that regardless of whether you agree with the Obama Admin's views on healthcare reform or not, it is useless and barbaric for mediagogs, on either extreme, to put out rumors and horrible things that are NOT true. I believe that people should make informed decisions based on facts and decide for themselves what they think is right, but no, our country is made up of people who want someone else to decide for them. So, they turn to the cracked out neo cons on Fox News, or even worse, Rush, and they believe every word. That would be like me listening to Left talk on Sirius for ALL my news and developing my opinions based solely on whatever they say. Ridiculous, yes? YES.

Ok, I am rambling, but this is what I abhor about politics in the U.S today. Noone wants to do some research, like ohhh I dont know, read the freaking proposed bills yourself instead of listening to some talking head tell you what MIGHT be on it. If you are going to accuse the president of being a socialist, or an effing Nazi for crying out loud, why don't you do some research on what those terms MEAN before you take it and run with it. mmmmk?

More good news...

I got a raise this week! Totally didn't expect it - I haven't even been there a year yet... but I certainly did not turn it down!

A slight change in the wind..

So, not many people really know this, because I don't tell every detail of my life to even my closest friends... I guess I am kind of a private person. But anyways, the last few months, since December actually have been pretty rough. Tony's work has been on a downhill slope. It just kept getting worse and worse.... After all was said and done, Tony and his boss had to lay off 17 guys, some of which were close friends. Tony's salary was cut by 5 %, then 5 % again, and his commision was cut by 20 %, and then a month later, another 20 %. THEN they cut 401k matching and some other crap too. You know, recession. That's how it goes. Well, we always say Tony's dad must be watching out for us because we always come through things, and I guess this is no different. A year ago when we moved here Tony was making a very good amount of money. More than we ever thought. I am SO glad we did not see that raise in income, move up here and buy a 300,000 dollar house or something and just go CRAZY. For some reason we kept our heads on straight, not forseeing the recession or anything that was to come.

Thank GOD. Well, we have made it through all the paycuts, the budgeting and the thinking OMG there is NOTHING in savings anymore... Time to ignore that and just pay the bills! But we are still ok, we can still pay all our bills and eat and have a little tiny bit left over. So it really hasn't been that bad, but it's just frustrating when you move somewhere for something that is supposed to be SO great and it just slaps you in the face.

Ok, to the point. We got word yesterday that Tony's company, Newpark, picked up 9 more rigs. This is REALLY good news. Not only does that mean more work and more commision for Tony, but he gets to hire back 2 of the really hard working guys that they let go a couple of months ago, who STILL had not found work yet. This also means we can breathe a sigh of relief and not spend every waking second worrying about saving, spending, BLAH BLAH. (Ok, so the worrying is more me than Tony, he has no idea about the money or budget lol)

I will say that I am very grateful for this past year. It has taught us how to be practical with our money, and we were SHOCKED at how much we couuld do with what we thought was so little. I had to remind Tony several times of the small amount of money we made it on when we were first married lol. Somehow you always forget those things.... and it is easy to get caught up in it all, to want the new cars and the stupid crap that piles up in your house for God knows what reason. It just becomes a bunch of bullshit, and it is easy to do that.

I am glad we didn't get there. I am glad we are finally at a place where we have our heads on straight as far as our finances go, and that Tony's work situation is looking up again. He certainly deserves it, he has worked his butt off since the day we were married. I am so proud of him.
And that is the end of that rambling mess ,lol.
Now, time to celebrate!! Too bad all of our friends up here have little kids and can't go out.... ;)

Update on the car situation.....

So, there is apparently nothing wrong with the car.

Acura ran a full check and sent us all the paperwork that had ever been filed on the car, and there was NO sign of ANYthing. We also had our friend who has worked in used cars in Tyler for years run the VIN and he found nothing. Then, we took it to the other Acura dealership in DFW and they ran every diagnostic imaginable and found nothing, again.

Tony tried to call the mechanic that originally called us and the phone was off... And the guy never even said his NAME. I mean its all a bit shady... but I have a 100,000 mile warranty so I guess if anything ever does happen they will have to cover it!

I wonder if the guy just had it out for the Acura dealership.... whatever, I'm just glad it's over.

I hate buying cars....

So, here's the story. About 3 weeks ago, we traded in my old car and got me an Acura. Used, a couple of years old but NICE. Nicest car I've ever even thought about owning. Only had 28,000 miles on it, still had 100,000 mile warranty, certified used, leather, sunroof, bluetooth,you know, all that. I love it.

SOooooooo then last week on Thursday a guy calls my work and asks for me. I was out meeting a volunteer so she took a message and he said that he was a mechanic at the Acura dealership and that he no longer works there, but he has some information about my car that the dealership withheld and he wants me to know. So I get back to the office and they tell me this , and I am like what the hell? How random is that? I had Tony call him because I didn't want to deal with it. The guy said the manager of the dealership was pushing cars through that had been bought at auction, wanting the mechanics to certify them as "Certified Used" even when they had problems. He said my car has possibly been wrecked, and he was certain it had been flooded, and he wanted us to know because if a car has been flooded all kinds of things can go wrong because of the computer system that basically controls the car. He said it could be dangerous to drive. We were like OH GREAT.

Attempting to make a long story short.... Tony called Acura (not the dealership, the company itself) and they directed him to the dealership compaint department, where they filed a claim. They finally called Tony back today and faxed him all the documents that had ever been filed on the car. It was originally bought new in Florida, then purchashed at auction and transferred to Texas, where it was leased to a company for a year. They tracked down all the documentation, auction disclosure documents and everything, and there was nothing that stood out. They faxed all the information to us.

We are hesitantly breathing a sigh of relief, but we are taking the car to another Acura dealership in DFW tomorrow and telling them to run certain tests that the guy from Acura told us to run so that we can see if the car might have been flooded.... sooooooo we will MAYBE know for sure tomorrow. Acura said that if the other dealership finds something that they will take away their dealers licence to certify, and proceed further with the claim, whatever that means. They said they have not had any complaints of this kind for that dealership though, and we are starting to think this guy might just have it out for the dealership or something. I really hope he was lying because I do NOT want to deal with all this. IF it does turn out, however, that something is wrong with the car Acura better pay up, and if they do not I will seek representation.

SOOOOO that is the latest saga of the Patterson household lol!! Who does this happen to? Good Lawd!

Going to Tyler.... again

...and again. ...and again. Why? Wellllll.....Tony's little sister Sherri got engaged last weekend (on her bday) and they are ready to get married! The wedding date is Friday July 24th and I am a bridesmaid. Good lord do we have some plannin to do!! Thats only 8 weeks! She already has a lot taken care of, which is good... but it looks like I will be in Tyler a LOT over the next 8 weeks. Which is all ok and I am very happy for her, but I like to keep my Tyler trips to like once a month... or less! lol. At least it is summer and I can spend a lot of time at the lake, woo hoo!

In other news I am back on my eating plan. I dont call it a diet because eating right is a lifestyle and I really need to STICK to it. I tried on the bridesmaid dress Monday and looked like a WHALE in it... so needless to say I ave some work to do. Specifically my arms have gotten super flabby. We are looking into buying a bowflex ( I HATE gyms) so maybe I can get into a daily routine. blah blah blah I know thats boring but I am trying to stick to this, and I feel like the more times I say "I'm going to be healthy", the less I will forget and, ohhh I dont know, eat nachos, or cookies... etc.

Ok, I am ready to get to the lake this weekend!! Now lets see how many weekends I stay excited about that.... lol

I hate....

Drama. Absolutely despise it. That is one reason why I was so glad to leave Tyler. Too much drama, too many people with too little to do but make things up so they could place some excitement into their otherwise mundane lives. I will not get into details, but several people over the past week have introduced major drama into our lives and I am sick of it. Makes you rethink who you trust, who you hang out with, etc. If I have to cut off communication in order to avoid unnecessary heartache, worry and anger I will. Sorry if that makes no sense.... Just frustrated. It'll be otay though!

In other news, I am having a terrible,no good, very bad work day. Really bad. But, I am not letting it get me down because I cannot live my life that way. I am looking forward. Never back. Screw 'em all! lol

I love....

Tony.

Today, he went with me to an arts/ crafts fair. We walked around, and around, and he never complained. We bought stuff for both my mom and his for mothers day. THEN, we drove around a neighborhood I hadn't seen before and dreamed about living there in a few years ( little cottage-y homes, sidewalks, in walking distance to EVERYthing, TREES, yet pretty expensive)

THEN

We pull up into a parking lot of the Flying Fish which I have been wanting to try and we get fried fish and margaritas. Little did I know that he suggested that I have a margarita because he was about to take me shopping to several different boutique stores I had mentioned while driving by in the past. I mean, we left the restaurant and all of a sudden we are in a parking lot for the cutest little resale shop. So, I went in and shopped around and bought a shirt. I thought, well that was very nice, now we will go get groceries. NOPE, on to the next. Now, you have to understand me to get the significance of this: I. HATE. SHOPPING. I like clothes, but I hate shopping. Tony however loves shopping. So after all was said and done, I got a new ruffly dress (teal green) a black linen top with lace detail and a empire waist top with funky paisley print to wear out.

Such a good day. So thankful for him. ;)

Earth Day

Just saw a link to this, and I think it is awesome. Why can't all food come in packaging like this???? I mean, really? http://www.sunchips.com/healthier_planet.shtml?s=content_compostable_packaging

Happy Earth Day!

Let me take a moment to bask in the glory of my new flowerbeds. Yes, beds, there are TWO. Now they may not be that big or impressive, but this took me ALL day yesterday to make. The ground out here is so hard. I'm not kidding, there is rock about 5-6 inches down, so it is really hard to till up the dirt and create something that resembles soil. Anyway, I did it and I am soooo happy that I finally have SOMEthing to call a flowerbed in this yard of weeds. I will eventually add two cedar bushes for some height, but I stopped here for now. Pshew! Time for a nap. ;)

Cheese Graters are not good....

...when you grate off a little piece of your THUMB. ick.

I wish there had been a camera in the house so I could show you the ridiculousness of myself almost passing out at the sight of my own blood. This always heppens to me; I cannot STAND seeing my own flesh/ blood. Anyone else and I am fine, but when it is me I have to lay down and chill out for a minute or I will seriously pass out. I have done it before.

Ok, so I am cooking ground turkey for taco meat and while it's cooking I am grating cheese. All of a sudden I grate off like a centimeter of my thumb and then I look at it and see my flesh. Not kidding, it is surprisingly deep. I'm trying to find a bandaid, and the blood just starts to flow. I feel myself fading fast so i plop down on the couch and yell out " TONY i grated my thumb! Stir the turkey!" lol.... he was like oh lawd. I had to lay there for like 10 minutes before I felt like I could get up and finish making dinner.

Here's the catch line: I didn't find the piece of my thumb. We probably ate it somehow. HAHAHAHAHA